Nick Viall Bachelor Recap: Week 1

HOORRAYYY! Finally, my third favorite day of the year is here- The Bachelor Premier!
We all get to watch Nick Viall at his 4th attempt at love. You’ve gotta hand it to the guy, after being rejected 8million times on national television, he’s still up for more! I call that gumption.

This season begins with a very boring guy chat between Nick, Sean, Ben, and farmer Chris. They basically discuss how much Nick has blossomed from a creepy asshole to America’s sweetheart right before their very eyes. Touching.

Nick stands handsomely waiting to greet his 30 potential suitors, only to find that 15 of them are wearing the same dress. Good luck buddy.

First up we have our first impression rose winner, Rachel from Dallas. Yeehaw! {side note: she’s the first black woman to receive the first impression rose which makes me like Nick so much more} She tells Nick she specializes in civil-defense litigation and you can see the wheels spinning in his head as he tries to determine if he should know what that is or not.

I think I speak for everyone when I say Alexis’s entrance takes the cake though. She’s a dolphin trainer who apparently can’t tell the difference between a dolphin and a shark. She was definitely blackout drunk which just made her commitment to the outfit so much stronger.

Alexis The Bachelor
Also, Katy Perry’s backup dancers want their outfit back


Another crazy, but one I’m not rooting for, was Liz. AKA rejected you 9 months ago but now that you’re the bachelor I’m totally in to it. #GoHome

Then we meet this season’s villain… Corinne {self-proclaimed super serious business woman who says ‘her vagine is platinum’}. She lets us all know that she is spoiled rotten and has a personal nanny who brings her sliced cucumbers….yeah that’ll make America love you girl, keep talkin.  You can go home too.

Then we meet Raven, the southern fashion boutique owner in the style hub of America… Arkansas. She is actually super cute, but idk if Nick will be able to get past that accent. Then there’s Taylor, who got her Masters Degree from John Hopkins, which mean she definitely doesn’t belong on this show.

Then there is the mental health counselor who shows signs of perfect mental health by signing up for The Bachelor. She also offends him by letting him know that her friends think he’s a piece of shit.

Then there was Hailey, the Canadian. Which Nick informed her he was fond of. And all of America could hear Kaitlyn hysterically laughing about while her fiance is giving Nick the death stare through the TV.

Outfit fail of the night went to the girl in the yellow dress… Christen?
Whoever helped her pick out her outfit for the night was trying to sabotage her.

Bachelor Week 1


The rest of the girls were pretty un-memorable… Basically there was a lot of “Can I borrow you for a second”‘s and “I just want my time” blah blah blah.. Then there was the 20 minute rose ceremony with super dramatic music and a room full of girls who looked like they were going to cry if this guy they just met dumped them. Gotta love this show.

Now to wait another week for the real good stuff to start!



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